That first night

Yes, that first night. Changing the time. That day light saving system. Cant sleep.
a lot of e-mails on my mind, some that give me hope and some don't. Some that I already received and some that I hoped I would. Turning on all the sides I still c ant get my mind to stop thinking, imagining, hoping and wishing. Excited and scared of disappointment at the same moment. My head began to grow tired and I became more impatient. I decided to wake up. I decided to start this blog and express what I feel. Maybe I would find relief in emptying my head out, spilling my emotions over this cold solid ground of cyber loneliness.
hoping that I would hear someone's reply, maybe and maybe not. If that would make a real difference. Who knows? I wish I did.